“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.” Psalm 56:3

This has been one of Avery’s memory verses at church recently and as a family we recite it often. Right now as we get closer to moving to South Africa, and as the reality of our move gets more tangible, this verse is on repeat in my heart:

• When I am afraid that our visas won’t get back in time…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid that Cassidy will get sick again…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid that we won’t be able to raise enough finances…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid of losing my mind during the crazy long flights with 3 young children…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid that we won’t find a great home to live in…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid that our kids will have a hard time adjusting to life in SA…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid that our family will not be safe…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid to leave our friends and have to make new ones…I put my trust in YOU.
• When I am afraid of not having a Target down the street (or access to peanut butter MnMs or diet coke)…I put my trust in YOU.

You get the point…I am a ball of fear right now. A total mess. I put my trust in Jesus and I know that He is going before us as we make this big move forward, but I am still afraid. Not every minute, or even every day, but it creeps in often lately.

One of the things that comforts me the most in this verse is that David says when. Not if I am afraid, but when. The word if would mean that I’m a failure. I definitely am afraid, and not just in this part of our journey, but in so many other times of my life as well. Instead I know that it’s human to be afraid…but I am to put my trust in God. Because fear is not from Him. His perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18). YES, this is truth I can hold on to! And you can too!

So today, and every day, I choose to trust in the One who calls us to South Africa and I will not be afraid. Or at least I’ll be less of a fearful mess than I was yesterday…